The Middle part 2

everybody sing along!
Father MacKenzie
writing the words to a sermon
that no one will hear
doodoodoo Doo Doo
doodoodoo DOO doodoo DOO
doodoo DOO doodoo DOOooo
Please don't sing if you don't know the words.
Please. It's insulting
disrespectful not to mention annoying
Go back to Motown
if you're going to doowop all over the place
you need to relax
it's not abusive
it's love
it's what everybody talks about
the best part of what they talk about
if you want disgusting
you should fixate yourself
on coitus
on vanilla heterosexual sex
so squishy
so unbalanced
such an odd smell
I love you
little woman

you are
the only girl for me

you have such
they are
so cute
I like pretending
that you are under 18
it makes me feel powerful
little lady
and I love you
my big little man

you are
my boyfriend

your belly button
excites me
and is ticklish
I like pretending
to be young
so I can negate my own consent
without any extra preparations
and only the regular trauma

no one comes near
real music comes from the hipbone
that man on the slide trombone
knows the pelvis is the keystone
as he spins his wisdom through his brass telephone
his homespun notes are all handsewn
crotch music is all there is for the alone

If you skipped the earlier chapter,
you may have missed the instructions
for completing the sink fold
it’s simpler than it looks
and will add a refined appearance
to any origami design
if the figure demands it.
Like any tool,
the sink fold can be abused,
but you can use it to round corners
and create new corners
that you can fold into legs
or tusks as in the case of
the elephant below


no blame

I can only think
of two of the lesser animals
that trumpet
Elephants of course
and the Trumpeter Swan
They have completely different
playing styles however.

The elephant believes in tradition
the tradition presented
for over thirty-five hundred years
since the trumpet was first invented
in Ancient Egypt by the Ancient Egyptians
to mimic the sound of an elephant.

The swan uses a mute
and does not adhere
to any particular scale

he rushes to the water
and sticks his head into the brine
like an ostrich turning invisible
as he breathes the moisture
color comes back into his face
but we cannot tell
because the water is blue
He rushes to the water
and sticks his head into the water
and watches a fish fly by
The fish pretends to ignore the dragon
but we watch him turn the corner
and hide behind the corner
watching the head of the dragon
as he gasps for air
in the water
we are led to believe
that the fish has an agenda
of his own
He rushes to the water
craning his head into the flow
but his way is impeded by his friends
who shake their heads in intervention
The dragon points to his throat
frantically to express
the concept
that his throat is no longer functional
without the use of his inner fire
which has been quenched
and that now he must depend on his makeshift gills
in order to carry out the most basic functions
He rushes to the water
I spent the day singing
in my room
songs of self-loathing
to the tune of Camptown Races
My life is a useless waste
I have no redeeming traits
and lays his head against
the surface of the water
He tries to stick his head underneath
but it continually buoys to the surface
He jumps into the water
in desperation
diving deeper
flailing his limbs
to send himself down
His head remains
on the surface
of the water
and as his body descends
closer to the floor of the aquarium
his ineffective neck extends
as he coughs and otherwise
on the surface
of the water

she oiled him like a cuspidor rebuffed
his shell with thoughtful remedies
going to run all night
going to run all day
It's not as if I haven't tried to speak
to you I watch sometimes when you are out
and walking with a friend of yours and you
two speak together so concerned about
the state of theater in the minds of your
contemporaries All you want is to
be watched I think as I while driving in
my car transformed into machinery
no longer any man except for that
inside the beast who travels at high speeds
continue to remove myself from your
and others' judgments as an act of mercy
even though I would also like to be
observed sometimes and seen in grateful

PRINCESS REGINA used Devastating Blow!
KING GORGON laughed away the pain!

KING GORGON is unaffected by Kiss of Death!
What doesn’t kill him only makes him stronger!

UNSUNG HERO used Relieve!
It doesn’t affect PRINCESS REGINA…
KING GORGON suddenly feels much better!
KING GORGON’s LUCK increased!
KING GORGON’s LUCK maxed out!

KING GORGON is sleeping
He can’t attack when he’s asleep

KING GORGON is sleeping
He can’t attack while he’s asleep

KING GORGON is sleeping
He can’t attack while he’s asleep

i was
born a
i will
die a
where else
can i
live but
here in

In the modern era
conspiracy theories
are the
beliefs we
can count on

phenomena of hero worship
and each and every
are but one of the myriad
the global setup of mass
as one experience
are equally
consequences arisen from
leads to the same
interchangeable terms
  • There are many things that I am not
    Among these is a SADOMASOCHIST

  • One thing I learned from HUMPHREY BOGART
    when he took me under his wing
    and taught me how to be adored
    was how to be adored

  • all you ever do
    is sit around aloof
    and pretend to smoke cigarettes

  • It’s time you sent yourself
    into this world in a package saying
    you may already be a winner

Virginity is a trait

  • Virginity
  • is a trait
    • of the young
    • the virtuous
    • and the ugly
  • how can I tell
  • which one I am
how could you accuse
him of misogyny
that's like calling him a racist
or someone who hates the disabled
and the gays
and the people with political persuasions
he's above that
and only hates
professional philosophers
and optical physicians
and certain obstetricians
and their clients
Many people were solemn
She had planned for these circumstances
and had set up a series of lies years ago
that she could subvert at any time
and win approval for her divine change
and so achieve sainthood
without an act of GOD

KING GORGON is sleeping
He can’t attack while he’s asleep

(I learned my lesson
from the sadomasochism thing
I will never deny my necrophilia
until I am accused)

As the bears gave chase
Goldilocks searched in desperation
for a place to hide
She came upon a house
made of straw
but the house was too organic
for her tastes
and reminded her vaguely
of childhood
on her grandmother's farm
She searched in desperation
and came upon a house
constructed of bricks
and mortar
with even three-quarter inch
concave joints
but the house was too industrial
and made her feel out of touch
with some abstraction of womanhood
me fa sol me do
me fa sol te, la sol la
sol fa sol fa me fa
every rose and tulip
must be peeled
anything with layers
must be peeled
Civil War reenactments
must be peeled
Vanilla Wafers
must be peeled
Wedding Cakes
must be peeled
and any debate
(lives in a dream)
She searched in desperation
and came upon a house
of treelimbs stacked upon each other
in no discernible pattern
that she could discern
with the struts
not exactly sixteen inches
and the woodgrain
occasionally facing different directions
The bears were coming
so she decided to redecorate
i was
born a
i will
die a
moth will
get me
out of
she held him like a favorite pillow
fluffed him up with affectionate virginites

By @nohoperadio - Leah Lindsaychen

Facilitator and Proprietor of Tales of Insecurity, a podcast of post-modern existential horror. I like to make the best of a bad situation, and also to make better ones. I'm here to be helpful!

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